i-psychology yokukhohlisa

Ungabhekana kanjani nokuqhathwa: Nquma impilo yakho yesikhathi esizayo ngokukhetha kwakho

"Umyeni wami wangikhohlisa! kubuhlungu ngenzeni?"

Manje njengoba ukukopela sekuyinkinga yomphakathi, ngivame ukubona imibuzo efana nalena ezingosini zokubonisana eziku-inthanethi njenge-BBS. Ngokusabalala kwamaselula, iWebhu, kanye ne-SNS emphakathini wanamuhla, abantu abafuna ukuqomisana bangathola kalula umaqondana abamthandayo kumasayithi okuphola. Namuhla, inani labantu abakopela likhula ngokushesha, futhi nenani labantu abakhathazekile ngokuqolwa liyanda.

Yini-ke okufanele uyenze uma uthola ukuthi isithandwa sakho sikukhaphele? Ngokuvamile, umuntu oye waqhathwa akanakwenza lutho ngaphandle kokukhetha phakathi kokuqhubeka nobuhlobo noma ukuhlukana. Nokho, uma usukhethile, asikho isiqinisekiso sokuthi ngeke uphinde ukhohliswe. Akudingekile kuphela ukwenza izinqumo ngempilo yakho yesikhathi esizayo, kodwa futhi ukuthatha izinyathelo zokuphila impilo engenakho ukukopela. Kungokwemvelo ukuzizwa udabuke ngokwedlulele uma isithandwa sakho, obusethemba isikhathi eside, sikukhohlisa, kodwa kuwukuhlakanipha ukukhetha indlela yakho yekusasa ngomoya ophansi.

Lesi sihloko sithatha izinketho zokuthi "ukungahlukani" noma "ukuhlukana" futhi sethula izindlela zokuthuthukisa impilo yakho yothando yesikhathi esizayo kulabo abaqoliwe. Sizokukhombisa ukuthi ungamvimba kanjani umlingani wakho ukuthi angaphinde akope ngaphandle kokuhlukana, noma ukuthi ungaphila kanjani ngokujabula kuze kube phakade.

Uma ukhetha ukungahlukani: Thuthukisa ubudlelwano bakho nesithandwa sakho futhi uvimbele enye indaba

Yenza isithandwa sakho sizizwe sinecala ngokukopela

Uma umuntu omkhohlisile engazizwa enecala ngamaphutha akhe, angase abe nomkhuba wokukopela futhi akukopele ngokuphindaphindiwe. Ngakho-ke, iqhinga lokuvimbela ukukopela ukwenza isithandwa sokukopela sizisole futhi siqaphele izono zabo.

Qaphela futhi ucabange “ngamaphutha” akho

Ngisho nomuntu oqhathwe naye angeke athi alikho iphutha. Uma ufuna ukwakha kabusha ubudlelwano bakho futhi ubenze buhlale isikhathi eside kunakuqala, kubalulekile ukufunda kulokho okwenzeka esikhathini esidlule sothando. Ubudlelwano bezothando obuhlukana phakathi ngenxa yokukopela buntekenteke kakhulu futhi kunzima ukubuvuselela. Uma usafuna ukusindisa impilo yakho ndawonye, ​​udinga ukuvuma umlingani wakho wesikhathi esidlule namaphutha enu bese nidlulela ekusaseni lenu.

qinisa ubuhlobo bakho nesithandwa sakho

Ngisho noma isithandwa sakho singenaso isifiso sokuthandana, kunengozi yokuthi umlingani okhohlisayo okhohlisayo uzosebenzisa ulwazi lwakhe lokukopela ukuyenga isithandwa sakho. Ukuze ugweme ukuphucwa isithandwa sakho, udinga ukuxhumana njalo futhi udlulise umyalezo wokuthi ``akekho ongangena esikhundleni sami.'' Uma kunjalo, ngeke uqhathe isithandwa sakho noma unesizungu, futhi uzokwenqaba ngesizotha uma ekumema.

Uma ungakwazi ngokuphelele ukuthethelela isithandwa sakho ngokukopela kuwe, ukuhlukana kungenye inketho.

Uma ukhetha ukuhlukana: Phuma obishini lokuqhathwa futhi ufune impilo entsha ejabulisayo

Sula ubudlelwano bakho obudlule futhi unciphise umonakalo odalwa ukukopela

Ubuhlungu bokuqhathwa bungaba nomthelela omubi ebudlelwaneni obuzayo. Baningi abantu abangafuni ukuphinde bathandane nomunye umuntu ngoba beqoliwe. Uma usenethemba elikhulu ngobudlelwano bezothando obuzayo, kuhle nilungise izinto nesithandwa sakho uma senihlukene, ningaphinde nixhumane noma niphinde nixhumane kuze kube seniphole, nizame ukukhohlwa ubuhlungu bokujola njengoba kakhulu ngangokunokwenzeka ngenkathi ukuyo.

Thola umuntu ongeke akhohlise futhi anakekele ubuhlobo bakho obulandelayo

Uma owake wathandana naye ekukopela, kungani ungapholi isilonda ngothando olulodwa? Uma uthando lwakho lokuqala lwaphela kabi ngenxa yokuthi isithandwa sakho sikuqhathile, kusukela manje, thola umuntu ongeke akuqole futhi ujabulele uthando lwakho nomuntu ocabanga yedwa. Yebo, ukujabula othandweni akukhona nje ukwethembeka kuphela, kodwa futhi kungenzeka ukuthi nobabili nigcine ninezinkinga ngaphandle kokukopela. Ukuze ubudlelwano bakho obulandelayo buhambe kahle, funda ebudlelwaneni bakho besikhathi esidlule futhi ube umuntu onolwazi oluningi lothando.

Uma ukhathele uthando, zama ukuhlala wedwa

Ukuphila kwabo kugcwele uthando phakathi kwendoda nowesifazane, futhi bangajabulela isipiliyoni esikhethekile sothando, kodwa ngesikhathi esifanayo kufanele baxazulule izinkinga ezihlukahlukene ezingokomzwelo. Uma ukhohlisiwe, uma unesithukuthezi ngokuphelele ngempilo yakho nesithandwa sakho futhi ufuna ukuphinde uthole inkululeko yokungashadi, ungayeka ubudlelwano obungenanjongo futhi uthole injabulo yokuba ongashadile futhi.

Zikhethele ezimpambanweni zothando

Usafuna ukuqhubeka uhlala nalowo muntu? Noma ufuna ukuhlukana futhi uqale ukuthandana nomunye umuntu? Asisebenzise ithuba lokuthi uqhathwe ukuze ubuyekeze ubudlelwano bakho bothando nesithandwa sakho. Ngemva kokucabanga ujule, unquma ukukhetha ongeke uzisole ngenjabulo yakho yesikhathi esizayo futhi uqale impilo entsha.

Izihloko Ezihlobene

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