Izichaso ezivela kumaqabane okukopela kunye neendlela zokuchasa: Ukuba bathi, ndiya kuyibuyisela!
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Xa ufumanisa ukuba isithandwa sakho siyakopela, ukongeza ekuthetheni nesithandwa sakho kwaye uzama ukubenza bayeke ukukopela, kusenokufuneka ukuba uveze isazisi sokwenene seqabane lokukopela kwaye ujongane nabo ngqo. Ngokukodwa, ukuba ixhoba lomcimbi lifuna ukufaka ibango le-alimony kwelinye iqela, kuyafuneka ukuba amaqela omabini axoxe ngomcimbi kunye nesixa se-alimony. Kwimeko apho, ukubonisana akunakuhamba kakuhle kwaye kukho umngcipheko weengxoxo ezivuthayo kunye nokulwa. Ukuze ugweme ukuhlawula i-alimony, iqabane eliqhathayo linokuthi linyanzelise ukuba ayilotyala labo kwaye lihlale lizithethelela.
Kwimeko enjalo, kuya kuba bubulumko ukuqwalasela oko kufuneka uthethe ngaphambi kokuba udibane neqabane lakho elikopelayo ukuze umohlwaye, umenze avume ukuba uqhathile, kwaye uyiqonde impazamo yakhe. Umzekelo, ukuba iqabane lakho lokukopela libeka izizathu, kufuneka ulwe ngamazwi afanelekileyo nacengayo ukuze ugcine isandla esiphezulu. Kweli nqaku, siza kuqokelela izichaso eziqhelekileyo kumaqabane okukopela xa ebonisa ukuziphatha okukhohlisayo, kwaye uqalise amanyathelo okuthintela.
Izichaso ezivela kwiqabane lokukopela kunye nendlela yokujongana nazo
Omnye, "Andizange ndiqhathe."
Iinyani azinakungqinwa ngaphandle kobungqina. Iqabane elingathembekanga elinyanzelisa ukuba alikuqhathi lisenokukholelwa ukuba akunabungqina bubalulekileyo. Okanye mhlawumbi ubeka iketile kuba ufuna ukuqinisekisa inani kunye nohlobo lobungqina bokukopela onakho. Ukuze uthintele ukubanjiswa liqabane lakho lokukopela, nceda unganikezeli obona bungqina bubambekayo, kodwa endaweni yoko unike obunye ubungqina bokukopela ukubonisa ukuba iqabane lakho liyaqhatha. Umzekelo, iifoto zabantu ababini abathandanayo bengena bephuma kwihotele yothando zibubungqina obunamandla ngokusemthethweni bokungqina ``ukungathembeki,'' kodwa kukwakho umngcipheko wokuba ubungqina buya kutshatyalaliswa liqabane eliqhathayo. Ukuba akuqinisekanga ukuba omnye umntu unako na ukusabela, kufuneka ucinge ngenyameko phambi kokuba uthathe inyathelo.
2. “Kusenokwenzeka ukuba bohlukana kudala.”
Ukuba ubudlelwane kunye nomthandi wakho buphelile, kodwa anizange niqhawule omnye nomnye, kuya kubonakala ngathi sele ukwinqanaba lokuhlukana ngokwembono yabanye, ngoko kukho ithuba eliphezulu lokuba iqabane lokukopela liza kuthatha inzuzo. kweli thuba kwaye webe isithandwa esinesithukuthezi. . Kodwa okoko nje anizange nahlukane neqabane lakho, ulwalamano lwenu lunethuba lokuphucula. Nokuba ubudlelwane abuhambi, akuncedi nto ukubanga ukuba nahlukene nobabini kuba ninobabini nje, okanye umntu wesithathu uyaniqhatha.
3. "Ndandingazi ukuba utshatile okanye unenkwenkwe."
Ungathini ngokumxelela, ``Nokuba kukuqhatha ngokungakhathali, kusekukopela.'' Liyinene elokuba ukuba isithandwa siqhatha ngokuzenza umntu ongatshatanga, iqabane eliqhathayo nalo limele libe lilo eliqhathiweyo. Nangona kunjalo, nangona wenza impazamo ngaphandle kokwazi, kuseyimpazamo, kwaye kufuneka uthwale uxanduva oluhambelanayo. Musa ukucinga, "ndenze impazamo, ndicela undixolele."
4. “Isithandwa sakho sikunyanzele ukuba nithandane.”
Umthandi oqhathayo kufuneka ohlwaywe, kodwa abo baqhathayo banoxanduva ngokudibeneyo. Nokuba unyanzelekile ukuba uqhathe, musa ukuyihoya intlungu oyenzileyo kwiqabane eliqhathiweyo. Kumntu oqhathwayo, omabini amaqela aqhathiweyo aphantsi kwesohlwayo. Kufuneka uqhagamshelane ngokucacileyo le ngongoma kwelinye iqela kwaye ubenze baqonde.
Kwakhona, ngaphandle kokuba uyagrogriswa, udlwengulwe, okanye uyadlwengulwa, kufuneka ube nethuba lokwala ngokuzithandela ukuba unyanzeliswa ukuba nibe nomntu othandana naye. Ukuba awukanqabanga, awunakutsho ukuba awunaxanduva kwaphela.
5. “Uthando lwethu lolokwenene”
Amanye amaqabane okukopela angenza amagqabaza akrwada kuba engafuni ukwahlukana nesithandwa sabo. Ukuba ubungenguye umntu onjalo, ubungayi kuba nobuganga bokweba isithandwa somnye umntu ngaphandle kwemvume. Ukuba umntu akaziqondi iimvakalelo zabanye abantu kwaye ucinga ngesiqu sakhe kuphela, kuya kuba nzima ukubenza bavume ubunzulu bokuziphatha kwabo kokuqhatha. Okokuqala, ngokuzolileyo mbonise into ethethwe ngomnye umntu, uze umncede aqonde imiphumo emibi yokukopa. Usengumntwana ongakwaziyo ukulawula iimvakalelo zakhe kakuhle, ngoko kusenokuthabatha ixesha elide ukumqinisekisa.
6. "Akukho xesha elizayo, sahlukana."
Nokuba bathe bohlukana, kuseyinyani ukuba wamqhatha. Kubaluleke ngakumbi ukucombulula iingxaki ezikhoyo kunokuxhalabela ikamva. Oku kungathathwa njengeyona ngxoxo ibuthathaka. Kutheni ungathi, `Nokuba awukwenzi oko ukususela ngoku ukuya phambili, nceda ungacingi ukuba isimilo sakho sangoku sokuqhatha siya kuphumelela.'' Njengomlingane wokukopela, kufuneka ucinge ngokuziphatha kwakho ukukopela kwaye ucele uxolo kumntu oye waqhatha. Kwimeko yobudlelwane, imbuyekezo inokunikezelwa ngendlela ye-alimony. Akubalulekanga nje kuphela ukuthintela izenzo zokukopela ezizayo, kodwa nokuqinisekisa ukuba umntu oqhathileyo wenza ngokunyanisekileyo.
Sebenzisa ulwimi olufanelekileyo ukwenza umntu okuqhathileyo acinge kwaye acele uxolo.
Xa ungathethi kuphela kunye neqabane lokukopela, kodwa kunye nomthandi wokukopela, unokujamelana nokuchaswa okufana nalokhu kweli nqaku. Ngelo xesha, ungasebenzisa phantse indlela efanayo ukubonisa isithandwa sakho ukuziphatha ukukopela kwaye umenze acele uxolo. Xa uthetha nomntu othe wakuqhatha, eyona nto ibalulekileyo ekufuneka uyikhumbule kukuba ubenze bacinge ngomcimbi wabo kwaye balungise iimpazamo abazenzileyo. Ke ngoko, xa uhlasela umchasi wakho, kungcono ukunqanda ukusebenzisa ulwimi olugqithisileyo kangangoko kunokwenzeka.
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