Phila kwintlungu yentliziyo! Ukoyisa njani intlungu yokuqhathwa

Kungakhathaliseki ukuba ngamadoda okanye abafazi, bambalwa kakhulu abantu abanokukhawuleza bachache kwintlungu yentliziyo. Ingakumbi xa uphulukene nothando lwakho kuba kukho umntu okuqhathileyo, imvakalelo mayibe buhlungu. Ukuba inkumbulo yokuqhathwa kwaye yalahlwa ihlala inzulu entliziyweni yakho, ukuphuka kwentliziyo kuya kuba buhlungu kwaye kuya kuba nefuthe elibi kubomi bakho bexesha elizayo. Okukhona nikunye, kokukhona kuya kuba nzima ngakumbi emva kokwahlukana. Ndade ndacinga nokutshata, kodwa ekugqibeleni ndalahlwa ngenxa yeqabane lam eli cheating. Kuyadanisa ngokwenene.

Ke kufuneka wenze ntoni emva kokulahlwa sisithandwa esikhohlisayo? Enyanisweni, nokuba intliziyo ibuhlungu, awukwazi ukuthi yonke into iphelile. Sifumene into kuthando esiphulukene nalo, kwaye ukudibana okutsha kunye nothando lunokusilinda ngomso. Ukusukela ngoku ukuya phambili, ndiza kukubonisa into omawuyenze emva kokulahlwa sisithandwa esiqhathayo, kunye nendlela yokuchacha kukwahlukana.

Yintoni omawuyenze xa intliziyo ibuhlungu ngenxa yokukopela iqabane lakho

1. cinga ngonobangela wokuqhatha

Ukuba ulahlwa ngenxa yokuqhatha, abanye abantu banokukholelwa ukuba asilotyala labo nakancinane. Noko ke, oku akuthethi ukuba umntu oqhathwayo uya kuhlala engenangxaki. Umthandi unokukopela ngenxa yokuba ubudlelwane bakhe bothando kunye nothando lwakhe lokwenene aluhambi kakuhle. Ukuba ukholelwa ukuba yonke into yimpazamo yakho yangaphambili kwaye ungalivumi ityala lakho, nokuba ufumana isithandwa esitsha, usenokuqhathwa kwaye ulahlwe ngesizathu esifanayo. Ke ngoko, makhe sihlolisise ubudlelwane phakathi kwethu nesithandwa sethu ngamava abuhlungu okwenzakala kwentliziyo.

2. Ukucinga kwakhona ngendlela ojongana ngayo nokukopela

Ukhethe ukwenza ntoni xa ufumanisa ukuba uqhathiwe? Ngaba ufanele usole isithandwa sakho ngokukopela okanye ukunyamezela? Ngaba ufanele ufumane umntu oza kuthandana naye kwaye uthethe ngayo, okanye uvumele isithandwa sakho singcamle isiphithiphithi phakathi kwenu nobabini? Ngaba baye benza uphando malunga nokuqhatha kwaye baquka iifoto zabo babini ababebaqhatha, okanye abazange bawahoye amadoda nabasetyhini abaqhathayo bengaqondi ukuba izithandani zabo ziyaqhatha? Kungenzeka ukuba ulahlwe ngumthandi wakho wokukopela ngenxa yokuba ungayisingathanga kakuhle ingxaki, ngoko ke kufuneka uphinde uqwalasele amanyathelo osele uwathathile ukuza kuthi ga ngoku.

3. Qwalasela ukuba kunokwenzeka ukuba ukukopa kusingxengxezo

Abanye abantu bakholelwa ukuba balahlwa ngenxa yeqabane eliqhathayo kuba isithandwa sabo sahlukana nabo, sithetha izinto ezinje, ``Ndifumene omnye umntu endimthandayo.' Nangona kunjalo, kukho uloyiko lokuba ukukopela ngokwenene kusisizathu, kwaye ukukopa bubuxoki. Ngelo xesha, ukuba usenenkxalabo malunga nesithandwa sakho, unokuzama ukufumana isizathu sokuhlukana.
4. Thatha inyathelo ngokuchasene nesithandwa sakho
Ndilahlekelwe luthando lwam, kodwa ndisenayo inombolo yefowuni yesithandwa sam kwii-contacts zam. Iifoto zenu nobabini, ezinokubizwa ngokuba ziinkumbulo ezixabisekileyo, mhlawumbi zisagcinwe kwikhompyuter yakho okanye kwiselfowuni. Kukho imikhondo emininzi yesithandwa sakho esikujikelezile, uyafuna ukuyicima yonke? Okanye usafuna ukuyishiya injalo? Ngaba uyafuna ukuluqhawula lonke unxibelelwano nesithandwa sakho ukusukela ngoku? Okanye ngaba usafuna ukugcina ubudlelwane bakho njengabantu obaziyo ukuze nibuyelane? Ubudlelwane bakho kunye nesithandwa sakho sangaphambili siya kuchaphazela ubomi bakho bothando bexesha elizayo, ngoko kububulumko ukuyiphatha ngononophelo.

Phila kwintlungu yentliziyo! Indlela yokufumana intliziyo eyaphukileyo

1. zixakekise ngenye into

Ukuzifica kwizinto oqhele ukuzenza okanye izinto obusoloko ufuna ukuzenza, ezinjengokufunda, ukuthenga, ukupheka, okanye ukuhamba, kunokukunceda woyise intlungu yokwahlukana. Nokuba into oyithandayo yantlandlolo luthando, ngelixa unengxaki yokwahlukana, zama ukufumanisa into entsha yokuzonwabisa ukuzalisa ukungabi nanto entliziyweni yakho.

2. Thetha nabantu abakungqongileyo

Kutheni ungalibali malunga nesithandwa sakho esibi ngokuthetha kwaye uzipholele nabahlobo bakho abakhulu, usapho, oogxa bakho kunye nabahlobo bakho abakwi-Intanethi? Enye indlela yokuwucombulula lo mba kukuthetha ngobudlelwane phakathi kwamadoda nabafazi, ukufumana iingcebiso zothando, ukuthetha ngeentliziyo ezibuhlungu, nokunxibelelana nabanye ngeemvakalelo zakho ezibuhlungu. Ukuba umntu othetha naye unamava amaninzi othando, usenokukwazi ukukunika iingcebiso eziya kukunceda kubomi bakho bothando bexesha elizayo, okanye indlela yokujongana nokuqhathwa.

3. Ndizakuzama ukulila

Xa izinto ziba nzima, eyona ndlela iluncedo yokuzikhulula kukulila. Abantu bayakwazi ukuzithulisa nokuzolisa iintliziyo zabo ngokulila. Sukuziva uneentloni uzikhulule kwintlungu yokuqhathwa ngeenyembezi. Noko ke, akufanele ulile ngalo lonke ixesha;

Isine. ukuziphucula

Ukuba ulahlwe sisithandwa esikuqhathileyo, unokuzibona sele uphelelwa kukuzithemba, ucinga, ``Ingaba andinomtsalane ngokwaneleyo?' Andikholelwa ukuba ndingaphulukana nomntu ombi ngolo hlobo.'' . Ngelo xesha, ukuze uphinde uthembele kwaye uqhubele phambili, kungcono ukuba uqale ukuziphucula kwaye uziqinisekise. Ukuba uyaziphucula kwaye uzenze ube nomtsalane ngakumbi ngaphandle nangaphakathi, uya kuba nentembelo yokuba nokuba uqala ubudlelwane obutsha, awusayi kuphinda uqhathwe ngenxa yengqondo yakho entsha.

Ntlanu. jonga isithandwa esitsha

Ewe, ukuba ufuna ukushiya ubudlelwane obuphelile ngenxa yokukopela kwaye uqale entsha, kufuneka ulungiselele kwangaphambili. Siza kubonelela ngeendlela zokuphucula ubudlelwane bakho ngokufumana isithandwa esimangalisayo esingayi kukuqhatha, kwaye sithathe amanyathelo okuthintela isithandwa sakho ukuba singakuqhathi. Ukuze woyise ukwenzakala kwentliziyo, kufuneka wenze izinto ezahlukeneyo.

Musa ukuxhomekeka kakhulu kuthando phakathi kwamadoda nabafazi

Kubonakala ngathi baya besanda abantu ngoku baba ``amakhoboka othando,'' abangakwazi nokuhlala ngaphandle kothando kwaye bakufumanise kunzima ukuchacha kwintlungu ebuhlungu. Nangona kunjalo, nokuba intliziyo ibuhlungu, lisekhona ingomso, kwaye nangona kubuhlungu ukulahlwa kwakho ngenxa yokuba isithandwa sakho sasikuqhatha, nceda ukholwe ukuba ixesha liya kusombulula yonke into. Ukuba ungadlula kwintlungu yakho yentliziyo kwaye uzifumane ubuyelene, ubomi obumnandi ngakumbi bukulindele kwikamva.